Am talking to myself right now, for there’s no one around,
And even when they are around, they just can’t hear my sound.
For it’s a conversation that lies between me and me
Because the way I see things within and around, no one else can see.
I don’t know if it’s normal, to speak with me and I,
But I know it feels better when I say myself a ‘Hi’!
Do people talk to themselves? Ask yourself the answer to this question, ask your close friends or family, and all you’ll get is a big ‘YES’! Each and every person has spoken to themselves at some point or the other…, I do it all the time… and I am not mentally ill!!! I have asked my friends, my family, in fact, I have also seen a lot of people talking to themselves… and I have also seen others stare at me when they see me talking and smiling and changing my facial expressions at the same time…, yes, it was embarrassing at first but then I just started to snap back and say, “don’t you talk to yourself, ever?!!” Not even one person has answered a ‘no’ to this reaction oriented question because they all know… we all know, that we speak with ourselves… and how can something that we all tend to do; be called ‘insanity’?!
Why Do You Talk to Yourself?
Writing on the basis of personal analysis, I think there comes a time when you actually ‘need’ to listen to yourself. I don’t know as to why ‘you’ talk to yourself, but basing my forthcoming explanation on the universal human behavior, I think we talk to ourselves…, or rather our conscience time and again is because we understand ourselves better than anyone else in the world. Taking to myself actually makes me feel more confident during the times when I see my confidence going down. For example, talking to myself that it’ll be fine when I need to do a presentation, or when a friend or family member fails to understand what I need to ‘hear’, makes me feel more at ease. The assurance that you give yourself actually gives you a boost, a sort of surety that you are there for yourself; and trust me, at times it is more important than ‘others being there for you’. Seriously, think about it, what are the occasions when you talk to yourself? Right before an important interview, while preparing for an examination, when things are wrong and you tell yourself that “no matter how bad it seems right now, you can go through it and you’ll be just fine”. I think talking to yourself makes you more aware of who you are within. Don’t you think so?
When is Talking to Yourself Considered Good?
You talk to yourself, ask yourself, “is it doing you any good?” When I asked myself, I got a ‘YES’ as an answer. I just thought about it and discussed with myself about how is talking to myself good. After analyzing the pros and cons, I concluded that it is a positive source of energy for me, which is definitely good! It is good when you feel lonely and you have yourself telling you that it’s fine. It is good when you need to be the source of strength to others and you have no one to show how you feel, except for yourself. It is good when talking to yourself actually makes you a stronger and confident person. So, if you talk to yourself in a way that helps you become a more stronger, focused, and confident person, and it is not affecting you in a negative way, be it socially or emotionally, then talking to yourself is not good… it’s awesome!
When is Talking to Yourself Considered Bad?
Well, it is bad when it is too much, or if it is too visible. I think talking to yourself is like praying. When you pray it stays between you and your God, no one else knows about it, and it is the silence that makes your prayer powerful. In the same manner, when you talk to yourself, I think it is the solitude that makes it worthwhile, and by solitude I mean the feeling of being connected to yourself when others don’t see it. Are others seeing it more than they ought too? Is the whole process of ‘you interacting with yourself’ involving others as well (most of the time) in the form of a weird bunch of audiences staring at you like they were born to do so? Is your way of intrapersonal communication bothering you as well? If the answer to these questions is a YES, then may be it is bad. Did you know that talking to yourself is also one of the main symptoms of mental illness, like Schizophrenia? If you think that your conversations with yourself are actually creating a mental instability, or, is demotivating you in every way, then you need to take control of your thoughts. Take professional help, if needed.
How to Stop Talking to Yourself?
Does talking to yourself actually make you feel all the more miserable? Instead of saying that ‘you can do it’, all you hear is that ‘you can never do it’? Instead of helping you control yourself, does you inner voice tell you that you are absolutely worthless, that everything happening around you is your fault? If this is your case, then it is time to stop listening to yourself and learn how to control your inner voice. Remember, you are the master of your mind or conscience, and that is how it should be! Mentioned below are some effective tips to control your ‘self talking’ habits. These tips are meant for those who want to stop talking to themselves because it is bringing a negative aspect to their life. See if they can help you.
- Try to talk to Someone: When you don’t want to talk to yourself, why not try talking to someone else about it? I know it can be embarrassing, but then you can always trust this one person who will be there to help, right?
- Divert Your Mind: Whenever you realize that you have started talking to yourself again, stop and divert your attention from it. Tune in to some nice and soothing songs, watch a movie, go play your favorite game, or socialize with friends. Trust me, it helps… a lot!
- Try Praying: I do that all the time whenever I can’t understand myself. Again, this option depends on your personal belief. If you do believe in prayers, and God, and a higher power, then this will surely help you.
- Change the Course of Negative Conversation into Positive: Now self talking to see the positive aspect is a little difficult to do, but then, it also helps. It’s like defeating your wrong-self in an argument. Need an example? Well, say that your boyfriend / girlfriend dumped you for someone else. You are lonely and talking to yourself about the whole scenario, and then you have yourself telling you that, “it was your fault, you were not good enough, you don’t deserve to be loved…”, you can stop listening to all this at once and snap back saying, “well I was good enough and that is why he was with me, maybe it’s time to look for something or someone better than him!” ?
- Think you Need Professional Help?: Have you tried all the ways listed above, or is it way out of your control now? If that is the case then you should seek professional help before you are actually ‘labeled’ as mentally ill. Trust me, hiding or avoiding it will make matters only worse.
They say ‘too much of anything is not good’ … which includes talking to yourself as well! I have already mentioned earlier that I myself am a ‘self talker’, and I am not ashamed of it. But then I know that it is not adding on to my troubles but actually helping me fight it. I also know that it is not affecting my social life, people’s opinion about me, or my emotional health, so yes, talking to myself is working for me, is it working for you?